品质培养的途径之一是承认错误。
Character is revealed in how we handle things that go wrong.
品质体现在我们如何去处理做错的事情上。
Years ago I had to choose someone to organize a huge meeting.
几年前，我需要一个人去组织一次大型的会议。
I gave an untested employee a chance,and he bombed it big time.
我把任务交给一位没有接受过考验的职员，他花了很长的时间才组织了这次会议。
"It was all my fault,"he told me.
“这完全是我的错，”他告诉我说。
"but if you give me another chance,you have no idea how far I’ll go to make the next one succeed."
“但如果你再给我一次机会，我会很快取得成功。”
He displayed such courage in admitting his failure that I did give him another chance.
他勇敢地承认了自己的失败，我给了他第二次机会。
And I’ve never regretted it.
我从不后悔我做出了这个决定。
He performed do superbly that my estimation of his character was higher than if he’s done it right the first time.
结果他出色地完成了这次任务，使他在我心目中的地位得到很大的提高，即使他第一次就做对了也不会有这么高。
The best opportunities to build character,however,are within our families,where we are constantly tested and most vulnerable to lapses.
然而培养品质的最好地方是在家里。在家里我们可以不断得到考验，极小的错误都会受到责备。
True character begins at home.
真正好的品质是从家里开始培养的。
Often we sense that we can get away with things around those who know us best,who will love us regardless of our conduct.
我们常常觉得我们可以从最了解自己的人那里得到谅解。不管我们做什么，他们都不在乎，都会依然爱我们。
This can end up subverting our character and our relationships.
这将导致我们的品质恶化及关系的僵化。
How often have we heard of someone who is a gem of an employee but treats his or her spouse like a piece of the woodwork?
我们常听说某人很受职员的爱戴，但对待自己的爱人时则表现冷淡。
Perhaps even more common is the following scenario;At one seminar,
我们经常碰到下面的一幕：有一次在研讨会上，
after I’ve spoken on the importance of demonstrating character within the family,a man came up and said,
我讲完品质的示范在家庭中的重要作用之后，有人走过来说：
"I like what you’re saying,but my wife and I just don’t have the same feelings for each other that we used to.
“我非常同意你的观点，但妻子却与我的想法不同，
I guess we don’t love each other anymore.What can I do?
我想我们不再彼此相爱，我该怎么办呢?”
Love her,I replied.
“去爱她，”我答道。
He looked puzzled.How do you love when you don’t feel love?
他迷惑地看着我：“当你对她没感情时，你该如何去爱呢?”
"My friend,"I responded,"Love is a verb,
“朋友，”我说，“爱是个动词，
The feeling of love in the fruit of love.So love your wife.
爱会产生感情，去爱你的妻子吧，
You did it once,you can do it again.Listen.Emphasize.Appreciate.
以前你爱过她，现在你可以再爱她一次，聆听、重视、欣赏。
It’s your choice.Are you willing to do that?
选择在你手中，你想不想去爱呢?”
Of course,I was asking this man if he was willing to search within himself for the character required to make his marriage work.
当然，我问他是否愿意培养自身的品质去维持他们的婚姻。
All our relationships follow the contours of life;they have ups and downs.
人与人之间的关系受到生活的影响，也会有起有落。
This is why our families provide a critical measure of our character and the opportunity,again and again,to nurture.
这就是为什么在家里可以看出一个人的性格的原因，这也是使我们的品质得以升华。
What became of the bank president who was involved sexually with an employee?
当这位银行总裁与职员发生暧昧关系后他的态度如何呢?
When I confided to him what I knew of his affair and the effect it was having on his staff,he ran his fingers through his hair.
我告诉他我知道那事及其给全体职员带来的恶劣影响，他搔搔头发，
"I don’t know where to begin."he said.
“现在我该怎么办?”他说。
Is it over?
“你是否还想继续?”
He looked me squarely in the eye."Yes,Absolutely."
他盯着我说：“绝对不会。”
Then begin by talking with your wife.I answered.
“那首先向你妻子说明白。”我答道。
He told his wife,who forgave him.
他把事情告诉妻子，妻子也原谅了他。
Then he called a meeting of his staff and addressed their morale problem.
然后他召开了一次职工大会说明士气低落的原因。
I have found the cause of the problem.he said.
我找到了问题的原因所在，他说。
It is me.I am asking you to give me another chance.
那是我的过错，我请求你们的原谅。
It took time,but eventually employee morale-a sense of openness,optimism and trust improved.
要改变是要一定时间，但最终职员的士气——一种坦诚、乐观、信任的精神——提高了，
In the end,however,the executive was doing him_self the greatest favor,
最后受益的还是他自己，
He was finding his own path to character.
他终于找回了自我。
