Lesson 121 Kick the Habit

There are millions of people all over the world who smoke. Most of these smokers have tried to quit smoking at least once in their lives, but in vain. Make no mistake; smoking is addictive. And once you are addicted, it’s very difficult to stop smoking. Many people have tried many different ways to kick the habit.None of them is easy.

Take a tip from me. I smoked for twenty-five years. Then one day, I decided to quit cold turkey after trying everything else. It worked. That was two years ago and I haven’s smoked a single cigarette since then.Good luck!

Lesson 122 Candy Helps?

Candy is trying to get her boyfriend Benny to quit smoking.

(C=Candy; B=Benny)

C: Benny, your breath smells like an ashtray. You’ve got to stop smoking!

B: I know. I want to, but it isn’t easy.

C: Why don’t you chew gum instead?

B: I can’t. I’ve got false teeth. Remember?

C: Oh yeah. In that case, how about eating candies?

B: If they’re as sweet as you, no problem.

C: Cut it out, will you? I’m serious.

B: Just kidding. Do I get a kiss if I really quit?

C: I don’t like the taste of ashtrays. Maybe tomorrow if you quit right now.

B: OK, you’re got a deal.

Lesson 123 Early to Bed, Early to Rise

"Early to bed, early to rise," so goes an old saying. But how many of us are in the habit of doing that?Not many, I bet. Most of us need an alarm clock to wake us up. But even that doesn’t always work. It’s too easy to punch the off button and fall asleep again.

The Lazybones Alarm Clock may be the solution to our problem. It’s specially designed so that it cannot be switched off with a simple push of a button. The clock has several "protective shells." You must open these shells one by one before you can turn off the alarm. If you don’t,it’ll keep on saying,"Good morning...good morning..." So if any of you lazybones need a morning call that really gets you out of bed, this clock might be just the thing for you.

Lesson 124 Daisy and Herbie are chatting.

Daisy and Herbie are chatting.

(D=Daisy; H=Herbie)

D: How come you were late for school again this morning, Herbie? Didn’t you just buy a lazybones Alarm Clock?

H: Yes, I did.

D: Did you forget to set it?

H: No, I didn’t.

D: Didn’t it wake you up?

H: It sure did.

D: So what happened?

H: I had a hard time switching the alarm off, so I gave up.

D: What do you mean you gave up?

H: I threw it out the window and went back to sleep.

Lesson 125 Partying with Foreigners

Partying is fun.But have you ever been invited to a party by a foreigner? What should you wear? Should you bring anything? If so,what? Don’t worry. Today we are going to give you some tips about partying with foreigners.

First, you should ask if it is a formal or casual party. Then you will know what to wear. It’s as simple as that. At a casual party, it is customary to bring a bottle of wine or some other refreshment. It is not considered polite to bring someone along with you unless you first ask your host. At more formal parties like birthdays, a small gift will be sufficient. Giving money would cause some embarrassment. Finally, never overstay your welcome. When it’s getting late, it’s time to thank your host for a wonderful evening and say good night.

Young kids like to party all night.

Lesson 126 Wanna Dance?

Candy goes to Dan’s casual party. Dan’s her American friend.

(C=Candy; D=Dan)

C: Hi, Dan!

D: Hi, Candy! Glad you could make it.

C: I wouldn’t miss your party for the world.

D: Thanks for the compliment.

C: Here, I brought some beer and a bottle of wine.

D: That’s great, Come on in. I want you to meet some of my friends.

C: OK.

D: Hey, everybody. This is Candy. Candy, uh... this is everybody.

(Everyone laughs as they continue to dance.)

C: Hey, don’t let me interrupt.

D: Wanna dance?

C: Uh...how about some wine first? I need to get in the mood.

D: Sure thing.

Lesson 127 A Shocking Experience

Taking a taxi in a certain Eastern European country can be a shocking experience. It is said that some taxi drivers have metal wires stuck into the passenger seats. And when a button is pushed,the seat will give you an electric shock. These taxi drivers don’t do this for fun. They do it to tourists who argue about the ridiculous fares they charge. Some drivers charge as much as ten times the legal fare. They have a secret switch which makes the meters run faster. If you refuse to pay, you are really in for a shock.

In one case,a German woman had no choice but to pay US$120 for a US$20 ride from the airport. She said that she was "really taken for a ride," but what could she do? Besides the electric shock,she was verbally abused and threatened with physical violence. She has only one piece of advice to tourists:"Take the bus or stay at home."

Lesson 128 A Long Ride

(F=Florine; T=taxi driver)

F: Hey, driver, are we going the right way?

T: Of course. You think I’m cheating you?

F: Well,it seems like an awfully long ride. (after a while) Driver, how come your meter is running so fast? Is it out of order?

T: Hey, lady, if you think I’m cheating you, you can get out.

F: OK. I think I’ll do just that. Stop the taxi.

T: Sorry, I can’t. We’re on the highway. You can get out if you like, but I can’t stop.

F: I’m going to report you to the police.

T: Ha!Ha! That’s what they all say. (They arrive.) See you.

F: I don’t ever want to see you again.

T: Same here.

Lesson 129 Dog Days Off

Have you ever made an excuse for not going to work? I guess most people have. But have you ever called in for a day off because your dog is sick? I bet you haven’t. Most people wouldn’t have the guts.

However, some companies in New Zealand find this as an acceptable reason for taking a day off. It is counted as paid sick leave. The reason, they say, is simple: "A sick dog is as much a dependant as a sick child." That makes plenty of sense, doesn’t it? This is now known in New Zealand as "dog days off." I wonder what the bosses in China will say if someone calls in for a dog day off.

Lesson 130 An Inch Given,a Mile

Karen calls the manager for a dog day off.

(K=Karen; M=manager)

K: Hello, Mr.Fu?

M: Yes. This is he.

K: Uh... I’m calling to ask for a day off.

M: What’s the matter? Are you sick again?

K: No. Um...actually it’s my dog. I think it’s that time of the month. I’ve got to take her to the vet.

M: I guess it’s OK. But I didn’t know dogs had periods.

K: They sure do. By the way, if she gets pregnant, do I get two months off?

M: Do you want permanent leave?

K: Uh...what do you mean?

Lesson 131 Lost and Found

In recent years, going abroad for a holiday has almost become a national pastime. Traveling is indeed fun. But those of you traveling for the first time beware! What should you do if you lose your luggage?Don’t panic. Just go straight to the airline you’re traveling with. They’ll direct you to the Lost and Found department.

In most cases, they’ll find your luggage. But you must not forget one thing when you’re at the check-in counter. Make sure you get a baggage check stub. Without it, the airline will have great difficulty helping you. Worried about what to say at the Lost and Found? Well, tune in tomorrow and listen to someone who has just lost his luggage.

Lesson 132 What’s in the Bag?

(W=Mr.White; C=clerk)

W: Excuse me. I couldn’t find my luggage at the carousel.

C: OK. Come with me, please. See if you can find it in this room.

W: (after a while) It doesn’t seem to be here.

C: In that case, do you have your baggage check stub with you?

W: Yes. Here you are.

C: OK. I’m afraid you’ll have to fill out this form.

W: OK...(He looks at the form.) Hey! Wait a minute. How can I remember every item I have in the bag?

C: Why not? It’s your luggage, isn’t it? You should know what’s in it.

W: Can you tell me everything you have in your pockets right now?

C: Uh...Um...OK, smart aleck! Just write down what you can remember.