What does it mean to relax? Despite hearing this term thousands of times during the course of our lives, very few people have deeply considered what it's really about.

放松是什么意思？尽管一生中我们会成千上万次地听到这个词，但是几乎没有什么人好好琢磨过它到底意味着什么。

When you ask people (which I have done many times) what it means to relax, most will answer in a way that suggests that relaxing is something you plan to do later  you do it on vacation, in a hammock1, when you retire, or when you get everything done. This implies, of course, that most other times (the other 95 percent of your life) should be spent nervous, agitated2, rushed, and frenzied3. Very few actually come out and say no, but this is the obvious implication. Could this explain why so many of us operate as if life were one great big emergency? Most of us postponerelaxation until our “inbasket4” is empty. Of course it never is.

当你问别人(我曾问过许多次)放松意味着什么，大多数人的答案不外乎是，放松就是某些有朝一日你会做的事——那些你计划在假期里，躺在吊床上，退休以后，或把该干的事都做完之后才有时间做的事。这自然意味着大部分时间(你生命中95%的时间)应该是在紧张、焦虑、匆忙、疯狂中度过。没有什么人会站出来说不是这么回事，而事实就是那么回事。这是否能解释为什么我们那么多的人把人生看作是一件连续不断的紧急事件而奔忙不停？我们很多人把放松推迟到我们的“收文篮”清空之后。但我们的“收文篮”当然是永远不会空的。

It is useful to think of relaxation as a quality of heart that you can access on a regular basis rather than something reserved for some later time. You can relax now. It's helpful to remember that relaxed people can still be superachievers and, in fact, that relaxation and creativity go hand in hand5. When I'm feeling upright, for example, I don't even try to write. But when I feel relaxed, my writing flows quickly and easily.

不妨把放松理解成一种心态，是你可以时常受用、而不是什么非要留到以后才能享受的东西。你现在就可以放松。记住，会放松的人依然可以取得辉煌的成就。事实上，放松和创造往往如影随形。比如说，当我感到绷得紧紧的时候，我甚至不会试着去写点什么。但是我放松时，会感到下笔流畅自如。

Being more relaxed involves training yourself to respond differently to the dramas of life  turning your melodrama6 into a mellowdrama7. It comes, in part, from reminding yourself over and over again (with loving kindness and patience) that you have a choice in how you respond to life. You can learn to relate to8 your thinking as well as your circumstances in new ways. With practice, making these choices will translate into a more relaxed self

要想变得更为放松，需要训练自己换一种方式对待生活中出现的种种事件——把生活中的“情节剧”变成一出温馨的戏剧。要做到这一点，在一定程度上就需要不断地用爱心和耐心提醒自己：对于生活的挑战做出何种反应的决定权在你自己手中。你可以学着去用新的方式对待自己的心绪和周遭情形。只要多实践，这些选择会帮你造就更放松的自我。